The side effect of beginning a new project, any project really, is that it is constantly buzzing through my head.
If I’m not trying to figure out what to tweet or write in the e-news, or remembering who I need to follow-up with, or write a thank you note, or which chapter I’m on, I’ve got visions of Hamlet running through my head.
Every few months, this culminates in a day with a single thought running on top of these buzzes: curl up in a ball. curl up in a ball. curl up in a ball. curl up in a ball.
But I don’t. I forge on. I sift through the to-do list, I patiently explain to my preschooler why screaming is not an option, I call and make appointments, I fold laundry, I scrub things, I research and comment and tweet and compose emails, and I sift through the to-do list yet again.
And the day ends with stress nightmares and I wake up with a stomachache.
And then I shut everything off for a couple of days. Everything. I ignore emails. I don’t listen to messages. I shove away the list running through my head. I sew and go for runs. I go on adventures in life.
And after a time, I’m ready to go back and forge on again.
This time, I’m back. But I don’t feel ready. I’d like a few more days.
Maybe it’s the end of summer on top of it all. Family vacations are over and Do-bug will be starting school next week. My personal fiscal stress rises to five alarms about this time of year with several impending birthdays and the holiday season approaching with nary a penny saved.
So the challenge this week is to forge on and take the time, all at once.
I don’t know if it’s possible, but my sanity depends on it.